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ANTiFanfix: Batman Eternal #23 “Review” + #1-23 Catchup

If you’ve been wondering what’s been going on in Batman Eternal, you’re in luck, I made another cheat sheet so you know what the hell is happening.

Once in a while an issue turns up and I feel like there’s nothing to report back to the world. It’s not that important things don’t happen, but it just feels boring as hell. Earthquake? That’s happened.  Potential martial law? Just words till it happens. Selina kingpin? Go read Batman 28 again, I’m sure it was interesting when you read it the first time.  So in light of that, I’m going to brush you all up on what all the characters have done since the start, but first, what little there is to tell of:

Batman Eternal #23

Stupid Parts

  • Near the end of the issue, they flash back to Selina and Rex talking, before she left the prison.  They could have had this conversation happen chronologically in the issue and nothing would have changed
  • The Architect seemed pretty surprised that the beacon he designed was earthquake resistant.  Maybe it’s the low self-esteem issues
Prison rape joke by a kid, super dark and gritty.

Prison rape joke by a kid, super dark and gritty.

Important Parts

  • An earthquake is produced by the Wayne Beacon, which still stands because it was made really good
  • Rex is officially revealed as Selina’s father and declares that as Queenpin of Gotham, she can stop the chaos from tearing everyone apart
  • Dr Tompkins, who was awake and not busy at all, is taking care of Jade (the girl from the Croc-Batman-Bard teamup) for Selina. That’s how a responsible person delegates tasks, Batass
  • Bard acknowledges all the things they don’t talk about in the series very much, like the dangling plot threads of the Arkham haunting and the robo infection. I didn’t even know anyone knew about those events to casually mention it
  • Mr. Ibanescu is at war with Tiger Shark for who can be the most ridiculous rich person
Some men hunt for sport, others hunt for food.  The only thing he's hunting for... is an outfit that looks good...

Some men hunt for sport, others hunt for food. The only thing he’s hunting for… is an outfit that looks good…

 


 

Now that that’s out of the way, here’s the only things you need to know about what’s happening, who knew it’d be this short??

Batman Eternal Catchup #1-23

Table of Contents
Batman
Jim Gordon
Tim Drake and Harper Row
Batwing and Jim Corrigan (The Spectre)
Dick Grayson
Barbara Gordon, Jason Todd, and Batwoman
Alfred and Julia Pennyworth
Stephanie Brown
Jason Bard
Carmine Falcone and Penguin
Architect
Hush
Rex and Selina

Batman

He's been up at all hours of the day preventing gang wars and solving mysteries.  Kind of sounds like what happened pre-Knightfall.

He’s been up at all hours of the day preventing gang wars and solving mysteries. Kind of sounds like what happened pre-Knightfall.

 

Jim Gordon

Jim was framed for manslaughter because he shot at a guy while being hypnotized into thinking the other man had a gun.  He was sent to Blackgate, where he busted some asses in a non-prison rape way. Also not in a consensual butt sex way, in case I have to be more specific.

Jim was framed for manslaughter because he shot at a guy while being hypnotized into thinking the other man had a gun. He was sent to Blackgate, where he busted some asses in a non-prison rape way. Also not in a consensual butt sex way, in case I have to be more specific.

 

Tim Drake and Harper Row

They discover that a strange nanobot virus is infecting people in a bad part of town, which leads them to seek out the creator of such things: Sergei Alexandrov. The three of them (plus a cyber monkey) are on their way back to Gotham.

They discover that a strange nanobot virus is infecting people in a bad part of town, which leads them to seek out the creator of such things: Sergei Alexandrov. The three of them (plus a cyber monkey) are on their way back to Gotham.

 

Batwing and Jim Corrigan (The Spectre)

They're investigating the magical who-ha at Arkham Asylum and get captured by Deacon Blackfire.

They’re investigating the magical who-ha at Arkham Asylum and get captured by Deacon Blackfire.

 

Dick Grayson

 He's dead.

He’s dead.

Barbara Gordon, Jason Todd, and Batwoman

 They traveled to South America and found the man who hypnotized Jim Gordon into causing trainslaughter.

They traveled to South America and found the man who hypnotized Jim Gordon into causing trainslaughter.

 

Alfred and Julia Pennyworth

Alfred's Super British Reconnaissance daughter, Julia Pennyworth was found by Batman during a trip to Hong Kong. He brought her back to the mansion so she could heal from her serious injuries. Alfred recently got fear toxin to the brain and is in the hospital. Julia found the batcave and is currently giving Batman radio assistance.

Alfred’s Super British Reconnaissance daughter, Julia Pennyworth was found by Batman during a trip to Hong Kong. He brought her back to the mansion so she could heal from her serious injuries. Alfred recently got fear toxin to the brain and is in the hospital. Julia found the batcave and is currently giving Batman radio assistance.

 

Stephanie Brown

She finds out her dad is the Cluemaster. Upon discovery of her father's mystery plan, she goes into hidding while he tries to have her murdered. She's recently donned the Spoiler costume.

She finds out her dad is the Cluemaster. Upon discovery of her father’s mystery plan, she goes into hidding while he tries to have her murdered. She’s recently donned the Spoiler costume.

 

Jason Bard

He was hired by Jim Gordon at the start of the series and is supposed to represent Jim in his beginning cop years. He's made to look like an all around good guy for most of the series until it's revealed (to the reader) he's a badguy, shocking!  While he might not be at the tippity top of the bad guy hierarchy, he seems to be in charge of a lot, including becoming the new commissioner.

He was hired by Jim Gordon at the start of the series and is supposed to represent Jim in his beginning cop years. He’s made to look like an all around good guy for most of the series until it’s revealed (to the reader) he’s a badguy, shocking! While he might not be at the tippity top of the bad guy hierarchy, he seems to be in charge of a lot, including becoming the new commissioner.

 

Carmine Falcone and Penguin

Carmine Falcone returned to Gotham to take it back for himself. He and Penguin had a bunch of gang wars and were eventually sent to prison. Carmine is moving back to Hong Kong soon.

Carmine Falcone returned to Gotham to take it back for himself. He and Penguin had a bunch of gang wars and were eventually sent to prison. Carmine is moving back to Hong Kong soon.

 

Architect

An old foe of Batman's returns: An earthquake!  The Wayne Beacon was secretly designed by the Architect from prison to cause an earthquake.

An old foe of Batman’s returns: An earthquake! The Wayne Beacon was secretly designed by the Architect from prison to cause an earthquake.

 

Hush

Hush infiltrated the Wayne mansion and injected Alfred with some fear toxin, and he's not stopping there.

Hush infiltrated the Wayne mansion and injected Alfred with some fear toxin, and he’s not stopping there.

 

Rex and Selina

Rex Calabrese, the big boss of Gotham before Carmine Falcone, was retired in prison. He wants his daughter, Selina Kyle, to become the Queenpin of Gotham so she can bring a bit of order to the criminal world, so they don't tear each other apart.

Rex Calabrese, the big boss of Gotham before Carmine Falcone, was retired in prison. He wants his daughter, Selina Kyle, to become the Queenpin of Gotham so she can bring a bit of order to the criminal world, so they don’t tear each other apart.

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Shane

Rookie comic reader, occasional "reviewer". When he's not reading comics he's playing Xbox and building igloos. Follow him on Twitter @Toonie_Fox