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ANTiFanfix: Batman Eternal #25 “Review”

Things are getting pretty exciting, but where’s that earthquake I ordered?  If it’s not here in 2 issues, it’s free, right?

Table of Contents
Fun Parts
Stupid Parts
Ranting
Paraphrase of The Week
Important Parts
Predictions
Batman Eternal War Journal

I had to include the agony faces on top, I couldn't take them seriously.  "ADRIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!"

I had to include the agony faces on top, I couldn’t take them seriously. “ADRIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!”

Fun Parts

  • Touching moment where everyone arrives to help Bruce
  • It’s feeling like it’s the the climax, which is good, excitement-wise, but …

Stupid Parts

  • …We’re halfway through this series and I don’t think it’ll keep up this speed for much longer before plunging us into some kind of post-apocalyptic crawl
  • Boy, that Batmobile is driving on perfect, non-water damaged or earthquaked roads, how nice. Bard mentions the “destruction at the beacon”, but I still haven’t heard ANYBODY mention a goddamn earthquake.  It would be fine if there was a visual reference that resembled cracked ground, but there isn’t.  Here’s a comparison:
Issue #25: "Look! That van was overturned by an earthquake!" Wrong! Rioters have been overturning vehicles for years without the entire planet helping them. "Maybe Batman just drives on the safest of roads and that's why we didn't see any earth cracks." Not likely. The earthquake looked like a pretty big deal 2 issues ago. I can't imagine why they wouldn't want to capture the full extent of the chaos.  And no, the streetlight isn't a sign either.  This is Gotham, these people are all mental.

Issue #25: “Look! That van was overturned by an earthquake!” Wrong! Rioters have been overturning vehicles for years without the entire planet helping them. “Maybe Batman just drives on the safest of roads and that’s why we didn’t see any earth cracks.” Not likely. The earthquake looked like a pretty big deal 2 issues ago. I can’t imagine why they wouldn’t want to capture the full extent of the chaos. And no, the streetlight isn’t a sign either. This is Gotham, these people are all mental.

This is from issue #23, pretty intense, right?

This is from issue #23, pretty intense, right?

This might be earthquake-related, right?  Nope.  It's a riot caused by Bard making Vicky write an article about how Gotham is being gangbanged by everyone with more bad on the way.

This might be earthquake-related, right? Nope. It’s a riot caused by Bard making Vicky write an article about how Gotham is being gangbanged by everyone with more bad on the way.

Issue #23, pretty deep hole.

Issue #23, pretty deep hole.

Paraphrase of The Week

Rants have overturned potential paraphrasing

Important Parts

  • Bard gets denied martial law, but they change their minds after his apartment blows up
  • Batman tries to find Bard after he finds out he was the one who released The Architect
  • Alfred is an induced coma to prevent all the screaming he’d be doing if he was awake
It took all of my will to not hear Skeletor's voice.  HE-BAT!

It took all of my will to not hear Skeletor’s voice. HE-BAT!

Predictions
Batman goes to Bard’s apartment to confront him about being a badguy, but runs into Hologram Hush. Is this hinting that they’re one in the same?  There’s a difference between dropping hints for mysteries and leaving giant marble sculptures in the shapes of hamed-fists, then leaving them unaddressed for a bunch of issues till you reveal it as if it’s a huge surprise.

Batman Eternal War Journal #2
I feel like I’m getting Batman Eternal Fatigue. Maybe in trades it would be ok, but this slow trickle with occasional exciting issues is agonizing  Actually, scratch that. Imagine reading an entire trade or two and feeling like plot threads aren’t getting resolved, ugh. I need a comic staycation.  Time to bust out that Astonishing X-Men I’ve been saving.

Jason, I . . . we're both so handsome.

Jason, I . . . we’re both so handsome.

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Shane

Rookie comic reader, occasional "reviewer". When he's not reading comics he's playing Xbox and building igloos. Follow him on Twitter @Toonie_Fox